I carried this question quietly for years while raising my autistic child into adulthood.

It shaped how I planned, how I advocated, and how I parented.

Over time, I realized something else.

Millions of parents are carrying the same question. A shared reality few of us talk about, but one only parents can answer.

That is where my work begins.

I help autism families and the organizations that serve them design Independent Living Plans that sustain daily life today and support a child’s future tomorrow.

You Are The Invisible System Holding Your Child's Life Together

Not because you chose to be.

But because the systems around your child were never built to function without you.

You probably do not think of yourself as a system. You think of yourself as a parent doing what needs to be done.

But when you pause and look closely, you start to see it.

The routines. The decisions. The coordination. The advocacy. The long-term thinking.

The truth is, most autistic children are not supported by systems that can run on their own. Their lives are held together by their parents or primary caregivers. When that responsibility is not shared or clearly documented, stability becomes fragile.

If you are unavailable, overwhelmed, or simply not there, many things stop working the way they should. Not because people do not care, but because so much of what your child needs depends on what you know and do every day.

I know this because I lived it.

For years, everything my child depended on lived with me. And it was not until I asked myself one hard question that I truly saw the risk:

What happens to my child if something happens to me?

That question is not fear. It is awareness. And awareness is where real planning begins.

Independent Living Planning For Families

It is a living, working plan that supports daily stability now and guides intentional decisions for the future.

An Independent Living Plan is a living, working plan that supports daily stability now and guides intentional decisions for the future.

It turns what parents already manage every day, from routines and decisions to advocacy, care coordination, future planning, finances, and legacy, into a clear, documented system others can understand and follow.

It reduces the pressure of being the only person your child’s life depends on, while creating continuity for your child and relief for you.

WHAT IT DOES TODAY

It supports your family’s daily life by making what already works visible and shareable. It helps you:

• Create clarity around routines, supports, and decision-making.

• Document what currently works and keeps your child stable, so that care remains consistent during illness, burnout, relocation, or crisis

• Connect fragmented systems so parents are not constantly holding everything together

• Reduce reliance on one person being available at all times

• Create continuity so others can step in without disruption

What It Supports Right Now

Helps you to create a foundation for long-term planning without panic or guesswork. It allows families to:

• Explore housing, support needs, finances, and community life with clarity

• Align today's decisions with your long-term vision for your child.

• Plan across transitions, not just milestones

• Maintain stability and continuity as circumstances, caregivers or roles change

• Ensure your child’s life remains supported, understood, and respected over time

• Turn years of knowledge, advocacy, parenting, and decision-making into a lasting plan others can carry forward.

WHAT IT MAKES POSSIBLE FOR THE FUTURE

A future you are not afraid to look at

This is where relief begins.

You are no longer carrying everything alone.

Adulthood does not arrive suddenly at 18.

It is shaped by the systems, skills, and structures built long before then.

An Independent Living Plan becomes a manual for today and a roadmap for the future.

It protects your child’s stability and gives you the freedom to breathe.

Community & Organizational Systems

Designing Support That Can Carry Families Forward

Families are already building the foundation.

The challenge is that most systems are not designed to pick it up.

The future of autism support cannot rely on siloed services or child-only models. It must align with the plans families are creating and support individuals through adulthood, transitions, and change.

I work with organizations that want to be part of that future.

This work is for:

Small businesses and service providers

Schools and community organizations

Autism-focused programs preparing for long-term sustainability

Together, we focus on:

Aligning services around parent-designed Independent Living Plans

Reducing fragmentation across supports

Supporting autistic individuals beyond childhood

Designing systems that remain usable as family roles change

Autistic children grow into autistic adults, yet most systems are still designed to stop at childhood. Services are often siloed, short-term, and disconnected from the realities families live every day. As a result, parents continue to carry the responsibility for coordination, advocacy, and long-term stability well into adulthood, often without support that can sustain what they’ve built.

The future of autism adulthood must be holistic and parent-centered. Independent living does not emerge from isolated services, but from plans that integrate daily life, long-term vision, and evolving support needs. When systems align around parent-designed plans, stability becomes transferable, services become coherent, and autistic individuals are supported not just now, but through adulthood and across life transitions.

Why Systems Matter

I’m Tutu Folorunsho, Independent Living Plan Strategist, Vision Advocate, and Founder of Being The System™.

My work is rooted in lived experience and guided by a systems perspective. I raised my autistic son, now a young adult, alongside his sister while navigating life across multiple countries. I rebuilt support networks from scratch more than once, and I learned how every system around an autistic child either stabilizes or collapses under pressure.

Like many parents, I carried everything in my head: the routines, the supports, the appointments, the decisions, and the future. Through this lived reality, I discovered a truth that became the foundation of my work:

A child’s future does not run on hope. It runs on systems.

I created Being The System™ because families deserve more than survival mode. They deserve a clear and coherent way to translate everything they know, everything they have been holding together, into a plan that can outlive them. They deserve a plan someone else can confidently pick up. They deserve stability, dignity, and long-term direction for their child.

Families are only one part of the ecosystem.

Hi

Your next step starts with a conversation.

Let’s explore your vision, your systems, and the path forward. Whether you’re planning for your child, your team, or your whole community.